Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
You said "It's ok guys, I know I'm not really a turtle" and then tried walking on the lake.
trying to imitate man vs food after 12 shots doesnt mean youll get laid
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
I just tried to eat one of my ear plugs, thinking it was a cheese curl. I need it to be break RIGHT NOW.
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
I would say I'm the man in the relationship but I'm cuddled on the couch eating cake mix and water.
That unicorn pillow pet really made sleeping with my head in the toilet a little better.
"Work from home" is code for "morning drinks" right?
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
I am literally so hung over that I just opened up my emergency kit, got out a survival meal replacement bar and ate it.
I want you to remember that you started masturbating in front of a car full of people. That drunk.
Now swiping left on 23-year-olds with abs. Is this adulting?
Randomize
