Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
im gonna make a bucket list just so i can cross off "underwater blowjob"
She tried to lure me back to her house by saying she had "real" pizza.
He said "ride me pocahontas" while I was on top of him last night
I don't care how high you are, you can't finger me while eating potato chips.
Ok seriously I'm living off of bologna but I have 4 handles in the freezer.
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
BECKY! ITS ANDY FROM LAST NIGHT WITH THE PILL
Andy, Sorry you have the wrong number. But good luck with Becky!
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
He was supposed to visit me tonight but he decided to stop in Tacoma so now I'm sitting on my bed naked eating oranges and candy corn while I watch Parks and Rec.
Now I have to hook up with him tomorrow DURING THE DAY.
I think you handled your pregnancy scares better than that cricket in your bathroom
YOUR TO-DO SEX LIST CANNOT CONSIST ENTIRELY OF MY THREE BEST FRIENDS
and their significant others
AND THEIR SIGNIFICANT OTHERS
I found a used condom and a hairbrush in my dryer this morning.
Hiring someone to do your laundry would be a good investment.
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