Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo
First, he can't make me cum.. And now, he can't get it up because he LOVES me?!!??! i don't think so.
I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
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Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
The movie was so bad she gave me two blowjobs. Two.
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
No, pictures of your dick will not make me feel better about my grandmother having a brain tumor.
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
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Just found out they make medicinal lollipops, bought like 40 of them. Gonna go fill a pediatricians lollipop bowl.
don't trust your eyes. just sniff them. if they smell like axe, they are broke, move on to the next.
Obviously. I'm here to let you eat things off my boobs and help you get laid.
A young (I'm going to guess late middle school age) kid shouted at me from the crosswalk GAS PUMP OF SHAME! I have peaked in life.
He is completely naked, curled in a ball, and rocking back and forth in the shower humming lullabies to himself. This is your responsibility since I'm going to be fucking someone in 5.7 seconds.
At this point, I would not mind getting hit by a truck. It would mean I could get this over with quicker.
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