If I were a boy, I'd name my penis Reptar.
I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
How can she be afraid to give you a blowjob? It's not like your penis is going to turn on her and eat her.
seriously who else gets carried home puking from a fucking mary kay party?
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Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
she fucked me tho cuz it was her cat's birthday. As soon as we were done she just says "ahhh tequila tuesdays"
I found him in bed on a pullout couch with another dude. He had two empty puke buckets and his empty bottle of jagermeister right by his head.
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
I let a blind guy feel me up. All he kept saying was "oh fuck yeah!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
I just wanna get drunk and go sledding in my kayak
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
Your friend was nice but you didn't have to bang her in my kitchen...just sayin.
If I hear the phrase 'these unprecedented times' one more time I'm putting my foot up someone's ass.
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