cab driver gave us mini bottles of jd for the ride home & proceeded to run every red light. wonder how many bottles he drank.
Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
also bought condoms to give away to people who look like they're about to make a bad halloween decision. I'm like a fairy.
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
Guess who has got hockey tickets for tonight? Only cost me road head going to and coming from the game
He played pinball with my ovaries. He won.
You asked me if you could throw up in my shoe.
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
Says the girl who left her friends to go have phone sex in the bathroom at Michael's
we're spending all day in bed drinking spiked eggnog and fucking
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
I'm like a camel in the desert in a black hole I'm so thirsty.
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