he screamed my twitter name while we were having sex.
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
I swear to God, I just heard my guardian angel tell us to stop. I think we should listen.
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
Just orgasmed in canada. I should get a sticker or something that says I orgasmed in a different country.
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
Masturbating on the clock at work is my specialty.
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
I just got a lap dance from a kid in the coconut bra... So not drunk enough for this.
Oh damn it. Let me get a beer. I can't take anymore bad news. Hold on.
I'm sexting at my family's 4th of July BBQ and I feel no shame....
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
Upon further investigation my nipples are bruised and I have teeth marks all over.
Randomize
