glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
He literally stopped in the middle of sex to look up sex positions on his iPhone...
I found a digiorno pizza in my washing machine.
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
Got paid to make out with a girl. It takes skill to be this drunk and still make money
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
Teaching my class, used paper clips to fix my hair. Too hungover to be a kindergarten teacher.
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
Got drunk and passed out flintstone vitamins to everyone at the bar. I'm just so god damn motherly
Pregnancy test = positive. Hope you still have our old guess who game 'cause daddy elimination begins now.
he brought with him gifts of cookie dough and penis. upgrading our relationship from fwb's to bf/gf was an incredibly smart merger.
Being an adult can't be all bad. I just took a vacation day solely to sit around and get stoned
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
So many questions...the two most important are, where the fuck is my booze and how did you even get the couch through the door?
Randomize
