new revelation: five guys for breakfast
new revelation: previous revelation not a good revelation
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
every time i wear that dress i get kicked out of a bar.
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
Just an FYI: The offer for you to come snow blow my driveway in return for sexual favors is still on the table
I hope you have a dream of a sloth with my face touching you erotically
Oh god. I just had a sex dream about the talking dog from the Bush's Baked Beans commercials.
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
Trust me.. Might look gay.. Might feel gay... But I could snap your neck with my inside thighs bro
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
Today I learned that I have a bigger dick than Draymond Green
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
Yeah like stabbing myself through the eye with a coffee stir and bleeding out all over the office rug
Randomize
