I love black thongs
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
We sold so many girl scout cookies when we were little. What went wrong?
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
Major win last night. I traded my roommate two cigs for a six pack and a bag of beef jerky. This has been a Brian weekend update
About to throw up, bathroom line up, Bro sees me. Yells, 'PUKER GET OUT OF WAY' THEY ALL PARTED WAY THREW ME INTO A STALL AND CHEERED AS I THREW UP INTO THE TOILET. we are going back
I'd help you out but I got Bacardi and Tequila poured down my snorkel last night and I'm still drunk
I have a tattoo that says Yolo. You should not have been asking my advice in the first place
my confident boosted when he told me that it was I who started making out with him. ME. NOT HIM.
I AM SHOCKED AND PROUD OF MYSELF
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
He’s really fucking cute. Like, I want his penis in my mouth cute.
"Why is there a bottle of Tequila taped to the fan?"
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