yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
you threw up in thedumpster behind red robin
and kept yelling "DIRTY BIRD"
No flights in Europe due to the volcano erupting. God himself is telling me to spend 4.20 in Amsterdam.
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
Just for future reference: milk is NOT a good mixer no matter how drunk you are.
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
Just set myself on fire a little bit. Made me think of you.
My snow day: told Cam, "we're not dating today, we're just roommates." No bra, boxers, drinking whiskey by myself for the past 2 hours, yelling at The Ultimate Fighter reruns from 3 years ago.
But on the bright side the arresting officer was just as hot as I remember and I took a pretty okay mugshot.
A young (I'm going to guess late middle school age) kid shouted at me from the crosswalk GAS PUMP OF SHAME! I have peaked in life.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
Mass text: You have all failed me. How have the people I loved so much let me go so long in life without ever eating a McRib sandwich?!
he was just sitting there in his underwear... and his chewbacca mask...
Randomize
