The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
Ok I can't be your drugdealer AND booty call AND friend. It just doesn't work that way
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
In all fairness I did warn the guy I just spray tanned before we had sex so I hold no responsibility for the bronzer all over his sheets
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
You should not be allowed to go away on the weekends I plan on getting drunk on. I need someone to stop me from punching this guy in the face. It's simple room mate etiquette.
I just came inside of a Gatorade bottle. That hungover.
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
You remember the guy they called Meat in high school? Well, let's just say my vagina remembers him now.
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
Didn't you used to babysit him?
18 years ago I helped him into his clothes. Today he helped me out of mine.
Do you know that you can buy Cialis in Mexico? Best. Honeymoon. Ever.
STOP FUCKING TELLING PEOPLE ABOUT THAT TIME THAT GUY CAME ON MY FACE WHILE I WAS ASLEEP!!!
Randomize
