My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
It's Friday. Sex?
my mom just threw water on me to get me awake and is screaming "where is my fucking car?!"
you gave me a ride last nite what the hell did you do with it after you left me?
OMFG I JUST SAW SOMEONE GIVING SOMEONE ELSE ROAD HEAD AND THEY HIT A POTHOLE. my day has been officially made.
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I told her I had to go to work this morning, got fully dressed in a suit, walked her out, drove around the block, parked, and walked right back in my apt and went back to sleep..
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
YOU ARE NOT A BOTTLE OF RUM THEREFORE I DONT KNOW HOW TO LOVE YOU
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
I sat on my couch last night watching What Women Want, eating ice cream, and sobbing "why doesn't she like me?" Why was I born a man?
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Well you were already wet from trying to drink straight from the faucet, so I just put you in the bathtub with a pillow and called it a night
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
I'm currently on an epic search all over the city for a drug store that isn't sold out of Plan B. I celebrated your birthday from afar.
My girlfriend is so strong now. Like on the one hand its kind of hot because she can pin me down during sex, but on the other hand she picked me up and carried me bridal style at the company bbq.
Aww well I’m kinda unsober so probably best
I'm praying to the gods of sex we both get laid this weekend. Amen. Love you
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