we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
He bought me a burrito. I introduced him as "Horse-Dicked Jake" all night. My debt has been repaid.
Reading old FB posts. Why did I ever stop drinking?
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
She dressed up in a sexy maid outfit for me, but she got mad when I asked her to actually do some cleaning.
I got to her place and she was petting her cat and pounding vodka out of the bottle. She looked like Dr evil in yoga pants. She's nuttier than squirrell shit.
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
I was on top for a full on make out when in dead silence "I'm moaning Myrtle" came from the TV. Moment ruined. I got cock blocked by a fictional ghost
You took the receipt and ate it. You then took it out and gave it to the waitress with slobber and holes all over it.
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
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