At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
Did the math... it's Magna Cum Laude whether I get a 4.0 or a 0.0 this semester. I'm blacking out now, wake me up when I have to walk across the stage,
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
When he wears his hair down and sandals, he looks like Jesus. A Jesus I would fuck.
That's not what Jesus is for
I met her at the quidditch match. She was the snitch and I caught her. After at the bar she walked up grabbed my hand and said snitches have flesh memories.
I was the girl at the bar last night passing out free condoms and making sure everyone knew how to use them to keep the population down
There's a whistle here and I just want to play my whistle song on it.
So besides your brother walking in on you shaving and singing "I'm gonna get asssss" how was your night
My Captain America poster fell down. Cap is disappointed in my life decisions.
So I'm getting really old. I feel asleep for a booty call that I initiated. The struggle is real.
Like Is it appropriate to tell your boss you banged a guy in the back of a truck at a wedding? Probably not.
Come over. We have half a bottle of jumbo champagne left and no boyfriends to slow us down
Ehh, the third backed out. Two still isn't bad. Who gets a bootycall to pick them up from a bootycall's house anyways? Only me.
Randomize
