Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
So we stole all of the newspapers out of the stands within a 1 mile radius and filled up her car with crumpled newspaper.
Who leaves their car unlocked at night?
Someone who wants to read the newspaper.
the girl sitting next to me in class is using her birth control box as a ruler
I had to close one eye to read the questions on my final this morning. That hungover.
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
Saw a guy throw up on himself while walking, drinking, and singing all at the same time. Hope your night is going better than his :)
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
I'm jealous that you can use my boobs as pillows & I can't.
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
You tried to ride his dick and fell off. Then tried to ride the floor. That's why he hasn't called back
Will Smith has a direct hotline to my emotions
I let my daughters ex boyfriend take me home from the bar. Hey, at least he's old enough to drink
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
I just tried to lit a bowl with my chapstick.
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