absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
New dating criteria: what kind of ex will this person be?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
Walking back from greek row alone at 3:30am in a child's kangaroo suit...not my proudest moment
Dude. Zebras have bad attitudes.
I'm really stoned in my underwear. I probably won't make it to the bar.
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've found myself wondering why I WASN'T naked before, but I generally always know why I am naked. Except now. WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ALL NAKED
Oh wow and I have a bunch of portable wine glasses called to go coffee cups
I just realized how terrible that was... I was drumming on your penis to a song about Baby Jesus.
I passed out drunk in her bed. Her boyfriend showed up and told me to go to the other room or we were gonna have a threesome. I threw up off the side of her bed and left. I feel like that was an adequate response.
I love how fuckboys immediately become cultured when I tell them I’m an artist.
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
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