Writing my paper on freud at bar
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
He asked about stds. I told him I don't have any... which I don't. They are now called sti's. Whooopsie
halloween makes it hard to decipher real cops... from sexy men dressed up as them.
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
you were asking all the dicks on chatroulette if they had daddy issues
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
Someone is gonna learn how to start an IV in the morning
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
I can't be here...my therapist just watched me take tequila shots
She just walked up to him and was like "you should fuck Angela" and it worked! She is the ultimate wingman
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
Really I don't care what we're doing or watching. Your penis spends way too much time outside of my body.