I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
I havent dry-humped that much since freshmen year. Forgot how good it doesnt feel.
Just threw up in airport security. Happy holidays.
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
He's sobering up. It was really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together.
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
I was desperately holding on to my sandwich while we had sex.
If you're not on crutches for breakfast, I'll feel like I've failed you.
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
I'm sure you can think of a way to make money.. God didn't give you boobs that awesome to waste them feeding your children..
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
You know your horny when you have a sex dream about Ace Ventura, if your wondering he's awful
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
Randomize
