So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
8$ liquor pitchers. I'm gonna wear two or three pairs of underwear so when drunk me takes them off there'll still be a pair on.
A-plus on my thesis. I deserve the blowjob to end all blowjobs. And I wanna wear a crown while you do it.
We found her naked passed out on the bathroom floor. She didn't even make it to the shower. She was clutching the bathroom rug.
You're in the clear; you and Andrew did not joint fingerbang that girl on the dance floor last night.
I am just pathetic enough to be sitting on the couch with my cat drinking absinthe and vodka watching moulin rouge. Hello, tuesday night.
Realized we were outta oj used gerber graduates mixed fruit juice as a mixer. Mother of the Year award right here
I can't name a single part of my body that isn't sore. Who says break up sex is bad sex?
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
guess who got crunk and thought it would be a good idea to give herself a pixie cut?
THOUGHT
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
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