HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.
My walk of shame was far more interesting today. He's moving and was cleaning out his apartment, so not only was I carrying my clothes, I also walked away with 4 bottles of cheap wine and a jar of ragu.
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
She wants to practice her harmonica skills on my penis
I told him I had AIDS after he bit me. His dad cried. I think I just ruined the little guy's 3rd birthday, but he had in coming.
I knew it would be a shit show so I just went ahead and took plan b before I even got there. How's that for responsible?
He walked into the pizza shop... Pulled the fire alarm.. And proceeded to dance to it...
There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
Turning 21 will be slightly bittersweet. Never again will I be able to get underage drunk at Disney World, now I'll only be able to get legal drunk and that just sets a whole different and sad tone for my life.
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
Well, I got drunk and told my family about what I expected sexually after a good first date.
It took him 15 minutes to put the condom on.
Randomize
