Lady GaGa only went backwards in convincing me she's not a man at the VMAs.
Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. I drunk emailed a professor on friday. Oh my god. Oh my god.
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
he just ordered a side of pineapple and winked at me. too much for a first date. come get me.
If I have to go to the hospital can we stop by the liquor store on the way?
Remind me tomorrow to take that ball-gag out of my purse.
Apparently I was holding on to a pizza crust for hours last night.
I have my ice chest next to my bed. Instead of breakfast in bed, its beers in bed. 10x better
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
Do you think they'll deliver pizza to my mouth
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
Theres a handprint of sauce on my fridge, one on my face, and a trail of it leading to my bedroom, and sauce all in my bed, and I have no idea what the fuck i ate.
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
Randomize
