I'm too stoned for this. I'm Canadian.
Im in the beachers at wrigley listening to four lesbians debate the pros and cons of 2girls1cup. Success.
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
Just made a Mimosa with Chardonnay and Emergen-C.
We had sex this morning and after she goes, " So are we going to do something for Valentines Day?"
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
Your girlfriend is in jail- I've just never been able to use that in a sentence before. Thank you both!
Oh my god. You have got to get off that breast feeding support group. They're on to you, dude.
Well, if you're getting/have gotten your dick sucked, you're welcome. If not, I tried. Step up your game, pussy. I pulled a MacGuyver and got mine. No excuses bro.
I got a blow torch for Christmas. You are now permitted to be afraid.
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone dad. And you’re also like a second dad to me who I also send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
Randomize
