Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
Why did I wake up this morning with 10 tally marks on my hand and a penis drawn on my tits?
Just seen a scantily clad pirate with 2 36 packs of natty ice on a bike riding with no hands. If she doesn't hit a speed bump she's golden and should be on the next Americas got talent.
I filled this oven with as much Pizza as I could, and I've been eating out of it for three days.
Just ate the last piece. Refilling the oven.
Captain Morgan didnt let me down when i stand up it feels like the world is trying to hand me rainbows.
Now I have the walk of shame to give the receptionist the bathroom key back, I've had it for 20 minutes. I should just smile and wink. She knows what went down.
third nipple confirmed
They're either celebrating their tax money or trying to kill each other.
I give all credit to my lucky thong, there's never a time I haven't gotten laid while wearing it
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
He went down on me for like 30 min and honestly half the time I thought about those videos where people can smash watermelons with their legs and I just wanted to do that to his skull
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
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