ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
We found an eightball on the ground last night. I mean, really, who does that?
Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
When you start quoting save the last dance you need to stop drinking
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today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
I kept reassuring him that I was easy like Sunday morning, not easy like "I've had 6 shots of tequila and haven't had sex in three months"
Is buying her a loofah for my house commitment like? I don't wanna give the wrong idea
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
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ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
Funny how the post-sex UTI lasted longer than the entire relationship.
Showing girls my stab wound was not the brilliant idea I thought it was.
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
Yeah. I hurt his pride. But he's not over it. And by it I mean me.
It took me twenty minutes to read that sentence.
All I said was okay...
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