a slip n slide in 50degree weather was the 2nd dumbest thing i have ever done. the 1st was hitting the wooden fence i believed was supposed to "help us stop"
Dude. Muppets take manhattan on netflix instant. Pass my midterm or relive my childhood? Tough decision.
He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
Fell into a man hole last night. I've been bleeding since 11pm. Got kicked out of the bar for being bloody.
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
She said we should all be mermaids since didn't breathe for 9 months inside our mothers. I want her logic.
Please just tell me how ugly she was so I can bask in the diminishingly small reassurance that might give me
She wont be able to take it all. I'll use a shoe horn to get it in if I have to.
Apparently my downstairs neighbors don't much appreciate it when I do drunk aerobics at 3am on a Wednesday...
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
Ted is on HBO in 20 minutes...not sure if this or the drunken dance party I had at the bar to a N*SYNC Christmas song 20 minutes ago is the highlight of my week so far.
I told her it would be awesome. We are all the same people. One of us would always be drunk, one of us would always be hooking up, and one of us would always be crying into a pancake.
I wanted one last NYC adventure and I got it. Now I just have to figure out a polite way to wake up the pantless former stripper illegal Russian immigrant street violinist chick currently in a vodka coma in my bed.
Randomize
