if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
I always forget that visiting my hometown is like a who's who of ugly people.
Everything smells like vodka and bologna. WHAT DID YOU DO?
How high are you?
I feel like breakfast can just fly into my mouth
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
Just had the "whores are people too" talk with Mom. Bright side it's Christmas, and I may have been drunk, I don't think she caught on.
He woke up in a dragon costume, covered in bong water. That was a party we will regret missing.
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
If I got paid for every bad decision I've made I would be one rich bitch by now
I'm handling the NHL draft worse than getting dumped this week
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
Dude. All I know is that I woke up on the floor with two naked chicks who don't speak English.
Clutch
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