our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
sorry i was making out with matt didn't mean for it to sound like that. there was no tone
there should be a new saying, don't text and tongue
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
Trying to low-key throw up in the ocean is harder than it seems.
Our lady landlord called. Dot worry, I handled it. Drunk. Tell her it was Nate. Done. Good. Bye. Drunk.
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
I just threw up in my front yard because my roommate was in the bathroom. Fuck New Years Day.
My walk of shame was 2 miles of feathers flying off of me, underwear in hand, and a homeless man telling me he'd pray for me. It was gold medal worthy.
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
She invited us over for cocaine and donuts
How am I supposed to buy weed and pancake mix when it's raining?
WHY DOES MY BOYFRIEND'S BROTHER HAVE TO BE SO FUCKING HOT
Randomize
