Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
im bored tell me something entertaining
You got period blood on my carpet. I lied to my mom and said it was jam.
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
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I am literally missing a chunk of eyelashes. That's how fun it was.
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
You kept running up to random groups of people and saying "I'm a Dallas Cowboy Cheerleader so we all have to chug our drinks!" and they all listened to you.
by the end of the night two people were passed out at the table, three on the couches, and one in the bathroom. it looked like someone pumped sleeping gas into the middle of a dinner party.
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Oh my god I just remembered I bit a stripper last night.
Just fucked in a kitchen. I never want my penis that close to knives, stoves, or blenders ever again.
Douche bag was crowd surfing, sack punched him. Crowd carried him away in a ball of agony. LIFE=COMPLETE.
you walked in on him eating me out and screamed SHE'LL BREAK YOUR HEART BRO before body slamming on the ground and passing out on the floor
The last thing I remember was riding in a grocery cart with two strangers while a cop pushed us
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
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