Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
all we need is a shotglass and a helicopter.
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
Michael Bay diarrhea
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My low point of the night was when my roommate spit out her jello shot and i took it...
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
He said he had to make up a lie of why he couldnt sleep with her. It must really suck to have a sunburned dick.
First night in the new apartment. There are 12 people here i don't know, Tequila, and a crying girl locked in our bathroom. I think the apartment christening is complete.
Someone changed my text signature to "Also, I think I might be gay" last night. Also, I think I might be gay
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I caught him with his head in the spinach bag this morning. He was laughing demonically saying, "i love spinach, yes I do."
I don't care how sexy you think I look in my scrubs. Wanting a blow job is not a medical emergency.
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
New life goal: fuck in the shopping cart
Woah don't start going all boyfriend on me now, you're here for one thing and one thing only and that's sex, hot shameless sex.
I accidentally made jungle juice last night.
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