i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
Why did you put hummus in my pillow case?
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
At the bar. Madeline and I totally brought our own pitcher from home because they always run out. Hello alcoholism.
You just kept walking around saying "my brain is soup" then sat on the kitchen counter washing your feet. You bit the guy that tried to help you down
Dude he did say "let's go cougar hunting" and you KNEW your mom was going out last night...so it's kind of your own fault for not coming
Those tiny little fruit fly looking mofos. They fly past the phone and I grabbed them like Daniel-San
Just text the random number in my iphone notes that was entered at 1am. Should be interesting.
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
I'm one bad relationship away from owning seven cats.
He tried to throw up into a beer bottle. It was a complete disaster. Vomit went everywhere. It put the Bellagio's fountain to shame.
I told her I wanted to go swimming and she responded with jello shots, taking off her clothes, and jumping into the pool...I think I'm in love
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