i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
I am a mess. Weirdest thing: I woke up with a hammer under my pillow. No idea why.
Please fuck him. And then let me tell her. And then let me protect you from the knife she pulls from her Ed Hardy purse. Please.
I just called my cat a slut and she responded. Proudest moment ever.
Calling yourself a modern day Geisha doesn't justify being a whore.
Taped crackers to the wall. Sat I'n the dryer. Bobby had to pull me out by my hair. No more.
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
Only catch is you have to sleep in the same bed as me. But no worries, I plan on being in a random guys hotel room every night. So it's essentially yours.
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Wesley from the Princess Bride. I kept telling him what I wanted him to do and all he would say was "as you wish"
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
People who don't like drugs and guac are not people I chose to associate with
My mom found my empty case that I hid in my room and just said "now why don't you be a responsible underaged drinker and throw it in the recycling" and walked away. I'm in shock.
Randomize
