I think I sharted a yagerbomb.
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
He was sitting at the table eating ice and said, "I'm pretty sure everyone in my family has nipples."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My mom just set up beer pong in the dining room for family game night. and you ask why I'm still living at home.
Had a student tell me he misses the old Four Loko. He's in 7th grade. No one is allowed to claim I started drinking too young ever again.
I feel like I just tasted lung cancer.
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
Taking care of a girl who just peed on my floor so tonight is not a good night for sex
I gave him a blowjob to kill bill. 2 of my favorite things.
He said he discovered the mysteries of the universe inside an orange... I want whatever he was on.
Even my conscience is telling me to take this Wednesday's exam buzzed.
Randomize