Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
I just did a Kegel and my back popped. My vagina is a gift to penises everywhere.
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
Can you think of a sexual word rhyming with snorkel?
Dont even get me started. you fell asleep in my kitchen after being cockblocked when you tried to use my roommates bedroom.
Would it be inappropriate to send a friend request to the sheriff that fingerprinted me last night???
I'm six Popsicles away from an existential breakdown.
Pretty sure this ice cream truck is following me.
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
DIBS on your mom for my beer pong partner.
Oh please. Preoccupy yourself with my penis.
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
Randomize
