im at a bar with my dad last night and he got hit on more that I did
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
Dude just the look on his face when she sat down next to him, threw one leg over his, and just said "so..." was fucking amazing
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
A seagull just tried to steal my cellphone
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
Ya know, one would think a restraining order would keep me from fucking my ex.
I feel worse lying to the guy I hooked up with than I actually do for cheating on my bf
I just want to get drunk and not have to worry about you leaving me at the bar.
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
Idk if I want to put a bra on
Randomize
