somehow on my way home with matt, I ended up straddling steve on the sidewalk and polling the people walking by on whether or not we should have sex.
I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
I just woke up wearing retainers... they are most definitely not mine
You were so hammed, you asked your buddy in Economics to plot a demand curve for Parmesan Cheese.
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
This is the last weekend of getting drunk and having sex all nite with the plumber. I'm exhausted all weekend and I'm never going to finish the remodel at this rate
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
Gin and redbull in a wine glass. They think I'm keeping my wits with a really yellow Chardonnay. Gonna get ugly after a couple.
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
You fell asleep while I was sucking your dick
We somehow ended up in Oklahoma. Nick's been crapping for two hours and I'm afraid to call a doctor because who the hell knows what sort of stuff goes down in the middle of nowhere. So not a great long weekend really.
Randomize
