I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
Yeah. I woke up naked in his bed this morning and remember saying "Get a condom cuz I can't afford an abortion right now" last night. He didn't run. He's a keeper
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
We had sex in the woods. It was great until some bird started mimicking my orgasm sounds
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just did a beer bong in the shower while i was taking an actual shower its officially football time
it's 10:36pm. Do you know where your penis should be?
I'll be gone when you wake up but you hit a girl so I knocked you out. Never hit a girl. Unless it's with your penis.
My mom wants to know what to send you in a care package. She used cat emojis, so you know it's serious
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just in case the world ends tomorrow, I have an emergency contact group of booty calls I can send a quick "let's fuck" to before I die.
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
He woke up wondering who broke in and rearranged all the furniture. He reviewed 11 hours of security footage before I told him he did it while whiskey-drunk.
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
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