hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
Yeah sketchy neighborhood.. Some woman ran by screaming, "i didn't steal anything" as some cops rolled up and arrested her.
I woke up to his little sister feeling me up. I guess it's time to meet the family.
I swear if his heart was half the size of the cum stains he's left on my sheets we would have the perfect relationship
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
dude he passed out in the strip club on his birthday, WHILE he was getting a lap dance. That drunk.
Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.
Explain the King Dong next to my face.
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
extra points if i make kids and or the elderly cry
Hey. Did I get punched in the face last night?
Yeah. I told you I would and you didn't believe me.
Randomize
