I am spending my work day planning my weekend drinking schedule
He's pole dancing on a heat lamp.
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
I don't want end up bound and gagged in the back of a van headed for rehab. Bound and gagged OK. Just not the rehab part.
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
For only eating leftover pizza for breakfast today, you sure do have a lot to vomit up...
I vaguely remember taking a yard light, holding it up like the statue of liberty, and all of us at the party chanting the national anthem. What a glorious night
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
I almost wanna stick a tampon in and sneeze bent over to see if it actually shoots out
Like do I send him a nude to ease his mind off his brother having a stroke? I'm not very good with words when it comes to consoling... I would be a terrible mother.
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
I woke up to him watching me sleep and after I told him it was over he asked if we were still on for Vegas next weekend
Woke up went to work ate beef after three year hiatus shat my pants went to bed
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