from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
ugly people sure do ruin things
I don't think he understands what an important role his penis plays in my level of self esteem
At what point during this road trip should I let them know I've been drinking in the backseat the whole time and can't take my turn driving?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just beat off to internet porn while talking to my mom on the phone and eating a cinnamon roll. U have 5 minutes to get on my level
What's the most polite way to say "Congrats on losing weight, but no one is happy your boobs got smaller."
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
She seriously left me for a guy that likes his own statuses on facebook.....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She shoved a hot dog in my pocket and started grinding on it.
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
Dude I swear I'm scooping human shit out of the litter boxes. What the fuck happened last night?
Bro you were on fire last night...like a less Irish version of Liam Neeson
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
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