It was like a mary poppins bag, except a sexual mary poppins bag.
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
If I come over right now will you promise to distract your grandpa in the morning so I don't have to do the walk if shame with 1940's style judgement?
I posted my balls on ericas instagram. It got 17 likes.
WHAT THE FUCK JASON, WHY IS THERE A FREE BLOW JOBS BY LISA SIGN IN MY FRONT LAWN WITH MY PHONE NUMBER ON IT?! PEOPLE ARE PULLING INTO MY DRIVEWAY!
I just ate a raisin that tasted like wine. Is this real life or is this my body trying to tell me it's Friday and I should be drinking right now?
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
Her weave came out on the dance floor. She was twerking and shaking one minute and her hair flew across the dance floor the next. Great way to be introduced to the family
You bring me burritos. Of course I text you during sex
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
well, shes hot as hell, but she does keep saying she's the president of the loch ness monster's fan club, so that's kinda a red flag...
After the 2nd person threw up, you told us that your 'mint shooters' were just shots of mint mouthwash
Sorry I missed your call earlier. I was getting high with my high school band teacher.
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