I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
he peed everywhere. it's like having a puppy.
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
we found you in the closet, clutching coats that werent yours for stability
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
Itd be like fucking a waterbed thats been locked in a barn for two years.
Where in the FUCK do you get your analogies
That one life defining moment when you catch yourself pouring whisky into your hot chocolate at 4 am, whilst crying and talking to your dog.
I've made my dad a martini every night since I was 13.. I got this
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
I'm having an emotional breakdown watching baby sloths on YouTube you need to come save me from myself.
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
I'm pretty sure I lit a prostitute's cigarette while sharing a pizza with a homeless guy last night
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
Did you make it home alright?
No I'm sitting under a tree by a cricket. He's alone crying out for someone to Fuck him. This guy gets me.
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