i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
Woke up with pink eye in both my eyes. That's how the threesome went
and thats when we got a drunken mammogram in the middle of cvs pharmacy
There's banana everywhere and your hamster may or may not have stayed the night in the microwave...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When I was with you my penis felt like a fat woman crammed into a pair of lulu lemons
The countdown is at hand. We are 15 days from so much Jameson that names will be forgotten. Prepare your liver now or severe projectile vomiting will be the theme of the night.
I told him if he wanted to lose weight he had to learn self control. Less than ten minutes after that I ate a cookie off the floor...
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Called my house today and my 10 year old brother answered and asked if I was still in jail
After 2 minutes he came and said, "thanks for everything". I can't wait to hear what he says next time when I do more than just lay there.
He kept spinning my wedding ring like thanks buddy I remember
can you tell me why i woke up in a diaper and combat boots?
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
If I'm getting through this pandemic I'm doing it drunk.
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