Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
true friends will drive 3 hours to come smoke a couple blunts with you on the bridge where your car broke down
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
Conversations we need to have while high 1) how mermaids reproduce 2) if blind people hallucinate what do they see 3) reincarnation
if i dont text back till morning its cause i turned my phone off and changed my password to something i wont remember to stop myself from drunk texting...RESPONSIBILITY
quick, give me some iron man trivia, i'm going to make this girl regret quoting tony stark in her tinder bio
You kicked me our in the middle of a blizzard with a dead phone. I had to give my watch to a pizza delivery person to take me home. You owe me a gyro too.
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
He's eating me out right now. That's how bad he is.
Is that your Nuva ring on the floor? Shit must have gotten crazy
Randomize
