i know we just met, but i forget your name, and i'm wondering why my penis burns?
wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
Sorry if this is weird, but please don't have sex in my truck. I get to be the first...
Now I can say "look me up on Pornhub."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
I don't know how I'm going to know it's her, I only know what she looks like with a wig on
SHE COULD ALREADY BE HERE AND I WOULDN'T EVEN KNOW
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
I feel like asking for a towel for after I puke before I puke to be more respectful than jus going outside to puke and coming back inside covered in sweat and tears.
All my friends are getting into relationships and going through breakups and I'm having Plan Bs and crunch wraps for dinner.
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
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