just won a stolen shopping cart in a dance off in a parking lot.
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
Here's a tip. Don't party with someone that needs sexual attention. Drinking and sexual attention don't mesh well in the morning. Especially over a bowl of Cheerios.
I think my staff loses a little bit of respect for me every time you're in town. I may have to puke at work ...again.
As a gentleman, I asked her if she was sure and she just whispered "wreck me" in my ear. I took that as a green light.
Did you drink ALL that 151??
No. We drank all the jaeger... Then used the 151 to start the fire. We're also out of paper towels... And your hairspray is flammable.
I just swallowed confetti and motor-boated some guys beard...#happy2015
My mom added me on Snapchat which means I am officially done with Snapchat.
You're now part of the minority of friends who haven't seen my boobs.
He just flipped the beer pong table and set the ceiling fan on fire things are about to get crazy
what a classic moment of my life. A buffet of taco bell and a taser gun.
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
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