Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
GUESS WHAT I JUST LICKED
I feel like half our conversations start this way.
he puked in his toast at dennys. after snoopdogg high fived him. couldn't be prouder to be his bro in law.
Someone just asked if you were the one who rode around the bar on some girls back
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
I'm riding shot gun after Shawn took a dump in a happy meal box because we were making record time.
I'm starting to think I didn't bring enough liquor for this family Christmas.
It's 2 pm....
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
I told my boss that I'm in a slutty stage of my life right now and the chef overheard and slipped me his number. I might get laid tonight
An orgasm and grocery shopping is the appropriate start to every Monday.
Fantasizing about the apocalypse is fun and shit until the conditions that could lead to one suddenly seem feasible
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
Ah Christ I think I've reached the single life mentality 100%. I just inquired a photographer about a photo shoot with my dog.
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
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