suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
He says he quit drinking. I'd like to have a moment of silence for losing the best drunken hookup ever. We will build a memorial to his awesome cock.
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
He chipped a tooth on the first beer. You know the night is just going to be a slushy mess after that.
I misjudged the power of my pelvic thrusting capabilities. His nose is broken. Thoughts?
She was mad I came so fast. I was like, It's the Olympics! Fastest time wins! We can train you in the offseason.
We are sitting here staring into each others eyes, mutually rubbing forks up and down our respective noses. High as balls doesn't even begin to cover it.
There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
I won the booty shaking contest by mooning the whole bar
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
Randomize
