How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
He's coming over, and I hope he doesn't get hungry. I'm sure its not proper protocol to bring one booty call to another booty call's house for the munchies.
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
This guy randomly got in our taxi, and has now collapsed on the sofa anouncing that he's staying the night.
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
I am pretty sure they consider me one of the "bros". They compliment girl's racks to me and are the human forms of dick-be-gone. They won't sleep with me more than once cause it's "weird", or let any "untrustworthy boys" sleep with me and I still help them get laid. Not...fair...
You know it was a good night when you're lying on the couch in your pjs at 4pm having a pitcher of ice water for breakfast.
I did however clean up the cupcakes and vomit so I'm not that bad of a roommate
Just peed off a cliff while playing white snake on my phone. Close enough?
Note to self:A blacklight toga party at a frat house is a bad idea. Some things cannot be unseen
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
You could cut the tension with my nipples.
Randomize
