Police were just in my backyard to recover a loaded .38. What the fuck?????
i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
I truly believe that the solid foundation of any healthy relationship is a drunken one night stand so I can just get all the nasty shit out on the table
just cockblocked my boss's 17 year old son at the Christmas party
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
If I EVER wake up with two black eyes again you better come up with a better story than trying to see how many punches I could take.
Watching frozen planet. There's a beach master sea lion with about 50 sea lion bitches fighting another sea lion for said bitches. It's a bloody battle. Dude. You have over 50. Share.
The universe is cradling this hangover like a gay couple cradles their newly adopted chinese baby.
We are in Florida for 3 days. The people in charge of shit brought: a waffle maker, a cheese grater and a SEWING MACHINE
AND NO VODKA
I'm sorry about the spring break comment. I won't make anymore pornos, I promise.
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
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