You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
Woke up naked in another mans house. If that keeps happening, then I probably need to go gay. You know to make it ok.
im eating kix cereal and taking shots by myself. please come hang out with me. im desperate
I have got to stop assigning last names to girls I get numbers from based on what I think will remind me of them... Sarah Petrydish is not an acceptable memory trigger
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
I'm with some lesbians. Somehow I offended them and the Justin Beiber one told me I was fat.
I don't know how I'm going to know it's her, I only know what she looks like with a wig on
SHE COULD ALREADY BE HERE AND I WOULDN'T EVEN KNOW
I was smelling my bathroom to make sure it didn't reek of weed...I spaced out and realized I was face to the wall sniffing it for 5 minutes.
Wanna get really high and go on a Valentine's Day Sexathon cause we're both single or would that be weird?
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
I think I used my hospital ID to cut the coke last night. I need to swab it for residue at work today.
yup and then I snapped out of it and realized I was playing beer pong against a 4 year old... and losing
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
Randomize
