He just went up to bed, still drunk from last night, carrying a pear, a pipe, and an unopened bottle of wine. I think he'll be fine.
i woke up to the sound of my roommate climbing onto my desk mumbling that she was going to bed
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
1.) where are you? 2.) you making meatballs? 3.) Meatballs for sex?
Smoked a joint and chugged some pepto. Feeling a lil better... Not sure which is working..... Gonna keep doing both.....
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ugh I need to clean my floors/walls/ I actually don't understand why boys get drunk and pee on things
Next time one of us has a party everybody has to wear a diaper. But actually you just need a shit ton of disinfectant wipes and maybe a hazmat suit.
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
I was masturbating and a roofer walked past my bedroom window.
A condom was pulled out of your vagina by a doctor today I do not think you can pull off "closet" hoe anymore
Do you know anything about how the saran wrap ended up on my toilet seat?
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